A widower who feels so alone has considered taking his own life. Mariella Frostrup replies that it is shameful that the rest of us have allowed this to happen – and also suggests ways to tentatively re-engage with the world
The dilemma I am an 81-year-old widower whose wife died three years ago after 30 wonderful years together. My family are very supportive, and I have very good friends and neighbours, which helps me manage myself and my home independently. I am still able to drive, which is essential in this rural community. I am very busy in the local community, and I keep myself active. I do, however, return to a lonely house. I have considered suicide, but have decided that this would be a lot of hassle for my family, who all live some distance away. I don’t know what help you can be, and I realise that there are many people in a similar position, but writing to you has eased the situation somewhat.
Mariella replies I’m so glad you wrote. How shameful for the rest of us that you should be feeling this way. As you are no doubt aware, you are one of a growing multitude of older people, still leading healthy active lives, in a world that seems oblivious once you’re past 70. If there’s one thing more old-fashioned than our ridiculous class system, it has to be attitudes to old age. Far more “primitive” societies have the sophistication to recognise the asset that maturity is and value it highly. In the UK, the number of elderly who are so lonely they contemplate suicide, despite having no serious illness or disability to contend with, is a national disgrace.
Continue reading...from The Guardian https://ift.tt/2y4U3dc
via
0 Comments